Mark Twain Quotes

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Quotes By author - Starting with M - Mark Twain

There are 306 quotes for the author Mark Twain

Quotations 281 to 300 of 306 Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.

All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.

Adam and Eve had many advantages but the principal one was that they escaped teething.

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term.

When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.

When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.

Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement.

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

Why shouldn't truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction, after all, has to make sense.

Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all."

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce.

There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one - keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

When in doubt tell the truth.

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives.

Quotations 281 to 300 of 306
Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

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