Dave Barry Quotes

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Quotes By author - Starting with D - Dave Barry

There are 93 quotes for the author Dave Barry

Quotations 21 to 40 of 93 Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5

I've gained a few pounds around the middle. The only lower-body garments I own that still fit me comfortably are towels.

I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.

We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days still had many of their original teeth.

I am not a violent person. I am a product of the Flower Power '60s. I have actually worn bell-bottomed jeans.

DNA is an abbreviation for deoxyribonucleicantidisestablishmentarianism, a complex string of syllables.

A gene can be either dominant or recessive, depending on which type of gene it is.

Crabgrass can grow on bowling balls in airless rooms, and there is no known way to kill it that does not involve nuclear weapons.

We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.

Like many members of the uncultured, Cheez-It consuming public, I am not good at grasping modern art.

I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.

Grammatically, should of is a predatory admonition; as such, it is always used as part of a herpetological phrase.

I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.

To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life.

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.

Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.

Miami does not have a visitor-friendly airport. At Miami International, a cramped and dingy labyrinth, the message is: Just Try to Find Our Baggage Claim Area!

The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

Quotations 21 to 40 of 93
Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5

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