Woody Allen Quotes

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Quotes By author - Starting with W - Woody Allen

There are 110 quotes for the author Woody Allen

Quotations 1 to 20 of 110 Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6

I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
Subject: Marriage

Eighty percent of success is showing up.
Subject: Success

Since man is made of clay, he can never be completely pure. Since clay is basically foul, how can humans escape their basic nature? Purity does not lie in rituals, nor can human nature be changed by effort. Those who love God and remain conscious only
Subject: Belief

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
Subject: Age

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.
Subject: Honesty

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.
Subject: Money

More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
Subject: Destruction

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Subject: Death

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.
Subject: Death

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?
Subject: Humor

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
Subject: Humor

Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
Subject: Life

It is no secret that organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year. This is quite a profitable sum, especially when one considers that the Mafia spends very little for office supplies.
Subject: Crime

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
Subject: Humor

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
Subject: Humor

Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-- particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.
Subject: Humor

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
Subject: Education

How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
Subject: Humor

Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.
Subject: Crime

I am at two with nature.
Subject: Nature

Quotations 1 to 20 of 110
Results Page: 1 2 3 4 5 6

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